Please contact Scott Hall at firstname.lastname@example.org or 202-463-5817.
Open Love Letter to the TPP
On Valentine’s Day, while the affections of some were for keeping the U.S. economy insular and closed off, this whimsical and humorous “love letter” showed what really gets American business going—open markets.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I love the TPP
And so should you
Dearest Trans-Pacific Partnership Agreement,
I can’t stop thinking about how great we’d be together. Dreaming of all of those exports passing through our borders keeps me up late at night. The possibilities are endless and it’s hard to keep me from dreaming about our future.
Comprising 40% of the world’s economy, I’d be a fool not to cross the Pacific for you. I’d go to twelve countries and span all three continents just to dance with you. But as we all know, love is a matter of quality, not quantity. Our love is meaningful and can satisfy our biological needs—especially if you guarantee to protect regulatory data for 12 years. You know, dear TPP, that I will drop to one knee and say “I do” for gold—no, diamond—standards for intellectual property. My creative and innovative talents need your protection. Without trade agreements like you, it would be a long, hard journey to jumpstart our economies.
And don’t worry – I love your trade promotion authority as if she were my own family. I’m ready to adopt her today if that would fast-track me to your heart. I can’t wait to call you my own and make sweet sweet economic progress with you.
Please be mine. I will be yours.
The American Business Community